Children’s Art Week – And Not a Junk Model In Sight

It’s children’s art week.

Oh God.

You’ve got to give up your home to glitter and glue. Or you’ve got to run around art galleries while parents in itchy looking knitwear wielding sugar-free rice cakes judge your ‘bum bum willy’ shouting Haribo munching children. Or you’ve got to pretend you love junk models.

It’s going to be awful.

But I say listen up fraught and frazzled parents, art and kids can be a beautiful thing. A fun thing. A cheap thing. Even a faff free thing. Really .

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My Poem About Boozing is Now a Song!

A couple of years ago Lords of the Drinks ran a poetry competition. Given that I like a poem, and that my specialist subject is drinking too much, I thought I’d enter.

The poem was penned on Burns night. Here it is

A few months ago, I got an email from the other side of the world. Andrew Beban from Off the Avenue Productions was involved in writing the music for a production called “A Man Walks Into a Bar”.

Could he, he asked, use my poem and turn it into a song to be featured in the production?

Hmmm. Let me think about that.

YES

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The Importance of Coffee and Communication in the Development of Young Brains

It’s all about communication isn’t it? Not just how we speak, but how we listen too. With that in mind, it is perhaps best to never hear the newest piece of child development research before sunrise, before coffee, through the medium that is Breakfast TV.

Given the pre-coffee circumstances, my first exposure to Save the Children’s “Lighting Up Young Brains” perhaps wasn’t all it should have been.

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Kim Kardashian posted a picture of a really boring bathroom

 

Kim Kardashian took a naked selfie, and yesterday social media couldn’t stop talking about it. However, it wasn’t her nudity that concerned me. It was the beige-ness of her bathroom.

Clearly, I’m not above gawping at nude folk. Clearly I saw a headline that said ‘Someone is totally naked on instagram’ and I thought I’d sneak a peak. And there it was:

Someone naked, looking fabulous, in a really, really boring bathroom. Continue reading