Me, Myself and I: A short story

I crept under the duvet, turned the bedside light off, and got ready to enjoy a peaceful night’s sleep. Just as my eyelids started to droop, familiar, muffled voices made themselves heard,

“Right on queue”, I muttered, bitterly. Not that they’d hear me, they never did.

I tried to shut my ears to them, but regardless their bickering remained crystal clear.

The first voice came, not yet loud but still seething and heavy with pent up frustration, “You’re going to bed? At this time? God, you’re so fucking dull.”

“I’m sorry, but I’m tired”,  came the weary, more gentle response.

“Tired? Jesus! Its only 10pm.”

The angry voice now started to shout, “What on earth have you done all day? The house is still a shit tip. The kids were screaming and fighting all day, and, let’s be honest, you look like crap. House is a mess, kids are a mess, you are a mess. Why the hell are you so tired? What about your life is so hard that you have to be permanently knackered and miserable and just so bloody disappointing?”

By now, as always, I found my desire to fall asleep replaced by my desire to listen a little more. As if aware of this, they fell silent. Then, just as I began to drift off, I heard the timid voice speak, trying to appease her protagonist.

“I know, I know, you are right, but I am trying my best. The baby woke me a few times last night. I was worrying about that motor insurance claim. We still haven’t booked the campsite. I’ve a lot on my mind.”

“How about”, came the response, increasingly livid, “Stopping thinking and moaning and worrying, and just fucking do something? Eh?”

The quiet voice became shrill, “You try doing something when you’ve got three screaming kids around your feet all day, and every time you do something it gets undone, over and over and over.”

Her opponent, was quick to respond, “Just listen to yourself, will you love? Stop your moaning, then maybe the kids will stop moaning. Do more with them in the day, then they’ll sleep better at night. If they sleep better at night, you sleep better. Then nobody’s knackerd. Then you can get your shit together. It’s not rocket science really, is it?”

Silence once more, then abruptly, the abuse continued.

“You know, you used to me so much fun! What happened? What did I do so wrong? Why can’t we still go drinking and partying and oh, I don’t know, having a bit of sex here and there? Would it fucking kill you?”

“I’m so…..

But before she could finish, “I knew you’d change. I knew you’d let yourself go. I just didn’t realise how heavily you and your big fat arse would fall. Not like your mates, they are still fucking gorgeous. Their kids aren’t always covered in mud. Their homes aren’t full of dust. You. Are. Pathetic.

Nothing. And then, “I’m sorry. I thought I’d be different.”

Her speech became garbled, faster, harder to make sense of. I heard, “The Russia situation and world war III”, I heard, “unpaid bills”, I heard, “how can I help my boys be happy?”, I heard, “I forgot to take the turkey mince out of the freezer.”

It became unbearable, and I started to feel an overwhelming sense of anxiety. I decided to take the situation into my own hands,

“I’ve had enough of this.” I declared out loud.

I snapped the bedside light back on, and sat bolt upright in the bed,

“Just shut up, the pair of you.” Now it was my time to shout.

I jumped out of bed and I went downstairs. I turned on the computer and I fired up my blog.

I ignored the voice that said it was too tired to bother, and the voice who said everything I wrote was shit. I began to write.

Within seconds, they fell silent.

21 thoughts on “Me, Myself and I: A short story

  1. Olivia FitzGerald says:

    So powerful, frightening and also…familiar. Last night I woke up worrying about bills. It’s so difficult not to worry about all these little things that are chipping away at us. Brilliant post 🙂

    Like

  2. djstevepinex says:

    Save for one typo that I noticed, you’ve done well with the construction. Pacing is good, flow is good and I can hear the argument quite clearly.

    When it comes to the argument itself, you’ve done an excellent job of setting the scene and sticking with it. It never ceases to amaze me how people who supposedly love one another can take the low road so easily, but it happens all too often. Their conversation gets to me and I’m sure that that was at least partly your intent.

    Nice work!

    Like

    • Abby Boid says:

      Wow. thank you for taking the time to read and for your really helpful and motivating comments. I was going to give this task a miss, glad I didn’t, thanks to your comments.

      Like

  3. Put It Together 4 U says:

    I agree with Olivia: VERY powerful dialogue. This eerily reminds me of a book I read recently in my psychology course called The Quiet. It was a book that I finished in two days. Your writing is a lot like that. I could keep reading, and reading…and reading.

    I was captivated by this relatable post. Great job!

    ~ Angela

    Like

      • Put It Together 4 U says:

        You’re welcome. I give my apologies for not giving the specifics of the book in my initial response. Just a search for ‘The Quiet’ will give you a host of titles and authors. Specifically, the book is entitled, “The Quiet: A Journey Out of the Torment of Madness.” I hope that helps! 😀

        Like

  4. josandelson says:

    Hi Abby – it’s brave indeed to open up like this. I think we’re all slaves of our inner voices and when you’re dead tired, it’s hard to put them to rest. You are a very good writer, I always want to read to the end even when pushed for time like the other day rushing back from school run (fast walk) when I stopped to read your post and wrote a lengthy comment (unfortunately i couldn’t log in from phone so you didn’t get it). Keep going, you’ll have a collection soon 🙂 x

    Like

    • Abby Boid says:

      Thank you Jo. You make me such a happy lady. And let me reassure you, I turned the volume up loud on that shouty voice in my head, and the quiet one is not quite so feeble in real life 😉 . I’m a bit overwhelmed by your comment so I am going to go now and have a cuppa – kettles always on if you are ever near x

      Like

    • Abby Boid says:

      Thank you so much. It is lovely to have such a positive response. I am also most delighted that it is not just me who can hear them going on at me ;-).
      Thanks for the RT and you and Jo, enjoy the BiBs and good luck xxx

      Like

  5. RossMountney says:

    Very familiar! As you’ve identified it’s getting on with it that’s the antidote! Have you come across the quote; ‘don’t get it right, get it written’! I’ve used that to spur me on many a time! 🙂

    Like

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