The Smoke Never Bothered Me Anyway: Why Frozen needs a health warning

Let It Go

I hated Frozen when I first watched it. Now, I secretly hope the “Let it Go” song is in the charts forever, so I can let its wave of intoxication rush over me.

“The kids love it.”, I say in my defence, as my husband rolls his eyes while his ears bleed.

Got me thinking, perhaps I’m addicted. Smokers amongst you, notice any parallels here?

  1. All the cool crowd think it is amazing. You sit on the sidelines hearing them talk about it. Can it really be as great as they say it is?
  2. First time you try it, you feel nauseous. And the second, and the third. What the hell is the fuss about? This is truly awful.
  3. The cool crowd continues to rave on about it. Surely it must be you who is wrong, not them. After all, they are cool. You persevere.
  4. Suddenly, you can’t imagine life without it.
  5. You breathe it in every time you are around it.
  6. You go out of your way to find little opportunities to experience its hypnotic magic.
  7. It’s utterly inappropriate and unsuitable for someone of your age to be sucked in to this nonsense. It makes it all the more appealing.
  8. You go to watch an assembly. They don’t sing a Frozen song. You feel exactly like you did when you were no longer able to smoke in pubs: unsettled, unnerved, outraged.
  9. The cost of it, and its associated paraphernalia, becomes prohibitive. But hand stitched Elsa dresses, like nicotine patches, just can’t satisfy the craving.
  10. The thought of that time when it is no longer part of your life brings a tear to your eye.

Yet of course it must end, this obsession is unhealthy.

Want to quit? I send you good luck – you’re going to need it. In the meantime, here’s your fix.

13 thoughts on “The Smoke Never Bothered Me Anyway: Why Frozen needs a health warning

  1. pirahnatrust says:

    Ahhhhh the joys of Disney. My little one is too young for frozen so I haven’t seen it yet. Thanks for showing me how to inhale. Now I’ll have to get the DVD (and some Disneyette Patches for when the honeymoon is over)!

    Like

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