When we don’t have the words we still need to talk. Especially to our children.

  
Mumsnet  asked if I would write a guest post about the Paris attacks, focussing upon how to speak to our children about atrocities such as this.

Should we speak about it at all?

I thought I didn’t have the words. I decided it was important to try to find them.

When we don’t know what to say, that’s when we really need to talk and listen to our children. Isn’t it?

Here is the post. Thank you for taking the time to read it. 

4 thoughts on “When we don’t have the words we still need to talk. Especially to our children.

  1. clara@expatpartnersurvival.com says:

    Unfortunately I live in a country (South Africa) where we HAVE to talk to them about some pretty awful things. LIke how to get out of a car without being shot if we get car-jacked, or why we have so many bars and electric wire strands on our fence. We are as matter of fact as we can be and we just make sure they know that there are far more good people in this world than bad. I also lived in Islamabad as the time of the 2008 Marriott bombing. Luckily both my children were too young to know what was happening, but I know a few of the parents with older children were really struggling to explain what was going on, why we had to leave. Especially as the Marriott was somewhere we all knew well. In the end I don’t think you can shield them compltely but recognise that younger children won’t really be able to process this information in a meaningful way and older children will be at a stage when it is just part of learning about the world. As for teenagers – I have no idea! I will let you know in three years…..

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  2. sabretoothedchickenstour says:

    I enjoyed your link post. I do think that you need to talk at a child’s level such as leaving out graphic details but I think the basics need to be left in – no good way to say them but they need to be said. I think you dispel the fear they may create with the other truths as equally powerful. The truth that there are people that are horrified by such acts, the truth that at risk of their own lives people helped others during the attacks, the truth that people cared for those who survived and comforted those that grieved and that most importantly that the people who commit such acts want us to hate, so we must not hate but combat it with education and love…

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